I Wanted to Show her the World...

These days everyone is asking me where I'm going next. And I'm not going to lie to you...I've been thinking about it. Of course, for someone like me, who has Carmen Jones Syndrome, "I hate being cooped up", I'm ALWAYS thinking about it. But ever since Mother's Day, everyone has been watching me with baited breath waiting for me to run away and hide, some place tropical, with VERY strong drinks. The heartbreaking thing is the reason that everyone thinks this is the same reason I'm currently "cooped up".

Mother's Day 2026 will forever be known to me as the worst day of my life, because it's the day that my mother gave up her fight against a very sudden illness. As my mother had gotten older, and I came to grips with her mortality, I often considered my “Post Mommie Death Escape Plan”. I was going to first go to North Carolina and hide under my best friend's bed. Then I would probably go and live in Spain or France and just be that eccentric (well dressed) American who wandered the streets with a large dog and a cup that smelled much stronger than just coffee. I would come home of course for the High Holidays and tell stories about my travels and the oil baron that I met while celebrating New Years in Tibet. Obviously, I thought I would be much older.

So now when I get asked this question, "where are you headed next", I don't have an answer. I know where I want to go. All I can think of, is all the places that I wanted to take my mom to.

Boston, For Tea of Course

When I was in my pre-teen years, my mother and I used to play this game. We would go to the mall and she let me try on clothes that I would never actually wear in public. Then we would put on airs in the dressing room and laugh at the faces that we imagined the people in the other stalls were making. I played a similar game with a friend when we went to Afternoon Tea at Raffles in Singapore. I knew that my mother would LOVE this game. She always said that she wanted to do a 24 hour trip to Boston, because we figured they could put on a mean tea party.  We planned to just go for tea and come back home.  I’m thinking next year for Mother’s Day that I will go to Raffles…and a cruise to Bermuda, for the cruise that I had planned to take her on for Mother’s Day this year.

California Zephyr 

Admittedly this is something that I wanted to do and I was going to bring her along because she wanted to “get away.”  We talked about taking the train to the Grand Canyon, or through the Rockies, but mostly to Denver, Colorado.  We talked about staying at The Brown Hotel and visiting the Molly Brown House. This was also another chance to have Afternoon Tea.  It would have also given her a chance to relax and do what she loved best, reading.  

What I REALLY wanted was to take her on the Orient Express.  She always encouraged me to read more.  Growing up, when books were made into movies, she always made me read the book first.  As far as she knows, I’ve still never seen Harriet the Spy; but between you and me…I snuck and watched it one day when she was at work.  I still try to do this.  I read the Hobbit in a week, just to be able to see it opening weekend.  When I first mentioned to my mom that I wanted to focus on “Nerd Travel”, she supported me as she did everything else, and loved the idea of being able to travel into the many books that she loved to read, like The Orient Express.

Best of Asia Cruise

Living in Korea was stressful at times but also divine intervention.  When she dropped me off at the airport I tearfully told her that while I was excited I was also scared.  Not about going, but that something would happen to her while I was far away.  It was important to me that she had some connection to my classroom.  I helped her decorate her classroom but she was too far away to help me.  Every year, my class had to do a speech on their favorite place in South Korea.  Since there were a couple of other topics that were similar, I changed it up, and they had to plan my mother’s trip to Korea.  She would stay up so that she could listen to the different places that they thought that she would like based on information I told them.  The kids all got a kick out of talking to the lady from the picture by my desk.  

I wanted to show her all of the places that had become my home, some of the places that my students thought she would like and to try all the different foods that I kept sending pictures of.  But I didn’t just want to show her Korea.  I also wanted to explore Japan and China with her.  She was always open to learning something new and we could have learned about different cultures together. 

Every trip I plan, every destination I write about, every time I encourage someone to stop waiting and take the vacation, I’ll remember my mom. My world shattered on Mother’s Day.  To lose her on such an auspicious day, while we were actively making moves to tackle her illness, and before a milestone birthday was a violent blow.  But, I am grateful for the time that I had with my mother.  For the memories that I will always cherish.  For the impact that she had on me which allows me to impact others.  I will always love her “mostest most”.